Author Sisonke Msimang talks bodies, sex and religion
READ MORE
It didn’t cause any harm, particularly given it was full of laughing. It was taboo, but not in a way that felt dirty or shameful. We knew that it was private; that it wasn’t something we should have seen. Over the next few months, we processed it. And because of all these other messages society sends to girls about sexuality – about bad women versus good men – things started to go awry. Conversations we subsequently had were about how [the family friend] was a bad woman and, of course, how he wasn’t a bad man.
You’re the oldest of three kids. Does that mean you were first to get the parental talk about sex?
There was a conversation with Mum about getting my period, a brusque mention of how men will try to get you pregnant, then a quick segue into, “And if you ever come home pregnant, I will throw you and the child out of the house and you’ll never be seen again.”
Wow, that’s a lot to take in.
Exactly! There was no, “When you find the right person …” That was white people stuff. That was the mother I wanted to have. The mum I got was like, “You will not get pregnant; if you do, don’t come sniffing around here asking for help.” [Laughs]
Comments
Post a Comment